All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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