He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
