she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
