Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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