just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
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