She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize