I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
