I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
