everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
