i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
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