found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
smell my finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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