Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
