This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
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