I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
The best revenge is premature balding
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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