16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize