Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
