garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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