he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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