i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
