this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
