Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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