Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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