you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
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