Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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