not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Found your dick twin last night
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
