mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
