Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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