We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize