some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
only you would photoshop your dick
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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