Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
