he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize