Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
