I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize