She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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