I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
