that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
