exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
