just come out here and I will go home with you...
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
