Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize