Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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