So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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