Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
