First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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