the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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