i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
