Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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