whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
