I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
