it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I love having hate sex.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize