North Korea, Best Korea!
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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